Bitcoin gets removed from top slot on CoinMarketCap
While the vast majority of the crypto market cites nominal positive aspects, there’s one token utterly wiping out the remainder. And it is the largest shitcoin of all of them.
Toilet Paper Token (TPT)—CoinMarketCap’s silly gag coin—is up 1,123% at the moment, swiping the top spot from underneath Bitcoin’s legs. However, sadly for these trying to get in on the positive aspects, TPT is already out of inventory.
Toilet Paper Token rises to the top on CoinMarketCap. Image: CoinMarketCap.
According to its prolonged “wipe paper,” TPT employs smut contracts to maintain monitor of the overall variety of rolls customers have bought. All in an effort to make sure towards hoarding.
“Holding TPT ensures wiper integrity and the fair distribution of toilet paper worldwide,” reads the wipe paper. “Our dignified roll is to maintain our position at our rarefied spot at the ‘turd level,’ where love and belonging abounds.”
With shares low, the TPT workforce is planning an ‘airplop.” And if that fails, there’s all the time the Initial Scattering Offering.
Per the asset’s wipe paper, the token features a stringent regulatory scheme to maintain the SEC joyful.
“Our Know-Your-Colon (KYC) process works with our bog-standard proof-of-wipe chain, facilitating each user’s KYC check that they are able to wipe by themselves, as users that don’t fall into this category are unable to participate in the token sale,” reads the doc.
Economist Nouriel Roubini gets his approach
The notion of Toilet Paper Token didn’t seem out of the blue. On March 15, economist Nouriel Roubini, who has lengthy had an issue with Bitcoin and cryptocurrencies, posted a video on Twitter—first featured on video-sharing platform TikTok—of a person paying for espresso utilizing bathroom paper.
Roubini, a professor at New York University’s Stern School of Business, commented that “soon most folks will run out of income/savings and their credit lines too. So to survive they need to resort to some other means of payment that liquifies some existing useful asset folks already hold.”
“That is where TP [toilet paper] comes handy,” he provides. “So maybe someone should rather create a virtual version of TP currency that to be credible gotta be fully backed by actual TP.”
He added that Toilet Paper Token will probably be a “100% fully asset backed currency” and “more useful than gold.”
Jokes apart, CoinMarketCap touches on an nearly comical actuality. In the wake of Covid-19 and the following panic shopping for that adopted, there’s been a mass scarcity of bathroom paper worldwide.
But like all the pieces in crypto, it should go from joke to actuality sooner than Jackson Palmer can say “Dogecoin.”